Averey, at age 6, seems slightly curious about who she is
going to marry. In her little world, there aren’t very many boys, and at this
point she’s convinced it will probably be someone she already knows. I told her
that she’s got a long time before she’ll meet her future husband. Jake and I
have a little laugh at this, and then we remember that we first met the summer
after our freshman year in high school. I was 15, and Jake was 14. Averey could
potentially meet her future husband in less than 10 years. Yikes!
When people ask how we met, we usually respond the same way.
We look at each other and laugh, and say, “4-H Camp.” It’s not supposed to be funny, but it’s just the beginning of our long love story. We’ve
now reached the point where we can say we met over half a lifetime ago. It
still makes my head spin sometimes.
I don’t exactly recall our very first meeting in June of
1994, but I do remember that Jake was hanging out with one of my BFFs, who was
a big flirt. I thought Jake was cute in his Miami Dolphins hat, and so I took
pictures of the two of them together. He seemed like the guys I was friends
with back home, but it wasn’t until the following June that we got to know each
other better.
4-H Camp started on a Saturday and we’d leave the following Wednesday,
so in that short time period, friendships blossomed quickly. Jake and I were
both counselors that year, it didn’t take us long to realize that there was
some chemistry between us. Sunday night at our vesper service by the lake, we
were sitting on his blanket, both in blah moods. My flirty BFF was mad at me
because the guy she liked apparently liked me. Jake seemed to like my BFF, but
she wasn’t paying him much attention. After we talked for a little bit, I
realized that I liked Jake. I thought he was cute, he was nice, he was shy, and
there was just something about him.
On the last night of camp, there was a closing ceremony with
songs and a 4-H lit up in flames. For those of us that loved going to camp and
meeting new friends, this would bring us silly teenagers to tears. Jake had
asked me if I would stand by him during the ceremony, and he said he wanted to
talk to me about something. I tried not to get my hopes up that it had anything
to do with me. But after he talked in circles, he basically said that he liked
me as more than a friend. This was music to my ears, but torture to my
16-year-old mind that it was on the last night of camp. I’d be heading back
to Montoursville the next day, and him to State College. Without 4-H Camp, we
might as well have been living on different planets. He said we could write
letters. Before the age of instant messaging, cell phones and Skype, and
neither of us having driver’s licenses (he was still 15), writing letters was
the only form of communication we had that bridged that distance between us.
After camp, I looked forward to his letters, and while he
wasn’t professing his undying love for me, we were developing a friendship. I
did get to see him again at the end of July as I participated in 4-H State Days
here at Penn State. I drove my friends crazy talking about him, not being able
to wait to get to our dorm room so I could call him from the landline phone
(which didn’t work, so I was in pursuit of a pay phone). He wasn’t a
participant, but since he was from Centre County, he and other 4-Hers we knew
from camp helped set up the evening dances. The first night at the dance, we
sat and talked. I so wanted him to
hold my hand, but the conversation flowed easily, which was of greater
importance than I realized back then. When we drive by the parking lot where
that dance occurred, to this day, I just have to smile in memory of that night.
The second night there was a different story. Jake knew that
I liked him, and it was pretty obvious he liked me too since we were acting
like a couple. But to my dismay, he wouldn’t ask me out. He told one of my
friends that he really liked me, but we lived too far apart. WHO CARES??? I
thought. I wouldn’t mind having a long-distance boyfriend! Inside, I was dying
(in a dramatic-teenager sort of way), but looking back, he was really smart.
 |
| The last day of 4-H Camp 1995, my favorite pic of us from that year. |
We got to see each other one more time that summer, as me
and my family drove to the Grange Fair. I still didn’t have my license, and
apparently I must have pleaded enough with my parents that they thought they
might like to go to the Grange Fair too. I was slightly mortified that I would
have to introduce Jake to my parents, but I was grateful to be able to go and
see him. This time, he wasn’t quite so affectionate with me, and he did not
introduce me to his parents. Alas, the shyness of his personality took over,
and he just said that things were “different” being at Grange Fair, but he
swore his feelings hadn’t changed. We still had a good time even though I was
dramatically frustrated.
The summer came to a close and we began our junior year of
high school. While we still wrote letters, I soon found that there were still
other guys for me to be interested in and therefore, I still had some boy drama
in my life. Jake was always in the back of my mind though.
When we saw each other again in the spring of 1996 at our
camp staff weekend, he was constantly picking on me, making it oh-so-obvious he
still liked me. I realized that I still liked him. But when I mentioned
writing letters, he said, “Why? Camp is just a couple of months away!” Okay,
thanks for the mixed messages. Too bad for him when I went to camp that I had a
new boyfriend back home! Yet we were still able to be friends without any
awkwardness, and the same went for State Days a month later. Our letter writing
had ceased, but I was at least glad we were actually still friends.
We graduated high school in June of 1997. I was not
returning to camp that year, but a friend and I went up to visit. Jake and I
chatted and enjoyed each other’s company, and I soon found out that he was
quite glad that I would be breaking up with my long-term boyfriend when I left
for school in July (a fact I had no trouble mentioning during that visit). A
couple weeks later, he wrote to me and told me that he was bummed when I didn’t
go to staff weekend that year, and he was really glad to see me at camp. He
confessed that he still liked me after two years and thought about me daily.
Say WHAAAT??? I was thrilled to be reading those words of his, but
flabbergasted nonetheless.
We saw each other a couple weeks later when he came to visit
at my county fair. I was reeling from the planned break-up with my boyfriend,
but the feelings for Jake were still there. We continued writing letters, but I
wasn’t quite ready for another relationship. He came to visit me at school anyway,
and there wasn’t any awkwardness in spending time together just as friends.
Even though I was convinced his feelings weren’t that
strong, there was a time when it should have been more than obvious. I had to
spend a weekend at school, and spending a weekend at my college wasn’t very
exciting since most people went home. (So lame!) I wanted visitors, and Jake
would have come down had his car been in commission. It ended up that one of my
BFFs, my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend (not awkward—seriously) were
headed to visit the Shippensburg campus and were going to stop at my school on
the way back. That morning, Jake called and asked if I still wanted a visitor.
I told him I was already having company (having him and the ex there would
certainly be a little awkward), and he seemed fine with my answer. In his next
letter, he confessed that when he called me, he was already in Harrisburg, just
down the road from my school. SERIOUSLY!?!?! I was almost mad at him for doing
that—had he told me his location, he could’ve come over for sure! He didn't seem to think it was a big deal, but for this girl, it was huge.
Stay tuned for part 2…
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